If the Shoe Fits...
| Xena: Warrior Princess episode | |
|---|---|
| “If the Shoe Fits...” | |
| Episode no. | Season 4 Episode 12 |
| Writer(s) | |
| Director | |
| Production no. | |
| Original airdate | |
| Episode chronology | |
| ← Previous | Next → |
| "Daughter of Pomira" | "Paradise Found" |
As Xena, Gabrielle, and Joxer, try to return a lost child to her father and "evil stepmother", they must also keep a captive bandit from rescue attempts and entertain the child with their various versions of "Cinderella".
Xena's version is the best:
- X's Voice: Tyrella had a stepfamily all right, but no one pushed her around. One day, Tyrella was busy sharpening her sword, when —
- Ale's Voice: Xena, shouldn't Tyrella wear a dress? If Tyrella's a girl, isn't she supposed to have a stepmother?"
- Zan/Stepm: Tyrella?! What have you been doing all morning?!
- X/Tyr: Well, let's see, I, uh, I fought a warlord, saved a village, and rescued a burning wagon full of orphans.
- Zan/Stepm: Hmm. Just as I thought — lolly-gagging again! Do some real work for a change.
- Baldy/Pelia: Mother! The prince is coming!
- Zan/Stepm: The prince?! Here? Honestly, Tyrella! You can't wear that! You'll be the shame of us all! Oh. Your Highness.
- Prince Joxer comes knocking with a slipper in his hand.
- PJ: I'm looking to wed the woman who fits this shoe.
- PJ [Clears throat]: Ladies, I'm looking to wed the woman who fits this shoe.
- Baldy/Pel: I'll try it on.
- 2nd Stepsister: Let me.
- Baldy/Pel: It's my size!
- PJ: Please.
- He spies Xena and kneels before her holding out the shoe.
- PJ: How about you? Would you care to try it on? If it fits, I can promise you a happy ending.
- Skeptically, Xena looks at the shoe, then extends her sword and takes the shoe on the end of it.
- X/Tyr: Wow. You know what, Prince? You seem like a real nice fella, so I'm gonna make this nice and simple for ya. I don't need you, or a fairy godsmother, or anyone else to give me a happy ending. That's something that I'll get — or I won't get — all my own self. So I suggest you peddle this shoe someplace else.
- PJ: "But — you could be a princess."
- X/Tyr: Come on. (and she escorts him to the door, poking him with her sword for emphasis)